The ice cream man is a summer staple in small town and suburban America. Even in the era of stranger danger, we buy ice cream out of a freezer truck from a guy we don’t know. Why? Because it’s hot out and ice cream reminds us of our childhoods. It gives us momentary relief from the stresses of modern life. Eli Roth has decided to take this slice of American life and turn it on it’s head because of course he did.
His version of the ice cream man is a creepy, smiling dude who gives out weirdly named ice cream bars and cones. The kids flock to his truck after a baseball game and eat his ice cream treats like they are the best thing ever. Well, with the exception of the main character Jared who is lactose intolerant. The following morning, the kids wake up in a trance when the ice cream truck drives by their homes playing it’s happy music. The kids kill their unsuspecting parents and go to school and proceed to kill their teachers. Well, except for Jared who never ate the ice cream.
Jared finds a couple other kids who also didn’t eat the ice cream and they try to survive. It isn’t until they end up in the basement of the local church that they find a freezer full of this ice cream and the priest tells them of that time a few decades previously when a priest was caught molesting kids and the town blamed the ice cream man instead. Now, the ice cream man had made a deal with Satan to get revenge on the town. And it was Jared’s grandfather who forced all the kids back in the day to lie and say the ice cream man was at fault and it was Jared’s parents who helped lie when they were kids. Sure, Eli. **audible sigh**
I wasn’t really expecting much from Eli Roth’s Ice Cream Man, but in the era of what has become known as elevated horror he could have at least tried a little harder. This film feels like Weapons meets the gore of Terrifier but all of what made Weapons so great is missing. This Ice Cream Man is no Art the Clown. He is creepy, but the twist of the priest giving this backstory at the beginning of the final act feels like a disservice to the film. Moreover, why on earth would the church have this freezer to begin with if the priest wasn’t helping the ice cream man that whole time? And why weren’t the kids asking themselves this question? The priest tries to explain it by saying that kids trust people in uniform, but what? And why, if these parents were really molested by the ice cream man when they were kids, why would they let their own kids near an ice cream truck?
I get it. Eli Roth is going for camp. Unfortunately, he’s got two serious things interfering with this campiness. One – the church cover up to protect a priest is something that is all to real in our modern society. There could have been some real commentary here about how it still happens, but there isn’t. Two – one of the kids who didn’t go into the trance intentionally puked up her ice cream and says that she is a girl and girls apparently do that all the time and that its normal. Eating disorders aren’t normal or funny. Had she just been sick on the day in question, I’d be okay with this. Alas, an eleven year old girl with bulimia is supposed to be funny.
Eli Roth’s past films have some sort of intelligent awareness to them that make them great. Cabin Fever shows the slow descent into madness that mimics the illness infecting the cast. Hostel II shows a female protagonist who smartly out maneuvers the people trying to kill her and features an artfully done death where a woman baths in the blood of her victim. The House With a Clock In Its Walls so adeptly handles grief and loneliness that it manages to be really heart felt. Where was this smart storytelling, Eli?
If this film had handled the church coverup with some commentary about our modern society and combined that with the brutal, sometimes funny kills in this film, it could have been great. Especially with the twist at the end where the kids think they are killing the ice cream man’s corpse in a grave but are really killing their own masked parents. I mean, really make that revenge plot about reaping what you sow and how that hate is handed down from generation to generation. Maybe I took this too seriously because it felt so much like Weapons without being like Weapons, but I wanted intelligent yet gory Eli Roth. And he didn’t show up.
2.5 out of 5 stars. Great gore and kills. Lacking in any story or character depth.
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Becky Tyler Art and Photography 
The ice cream man is a summer staple in small town and suburban America. Even in the era of stranger danger, we buy ice cream out of a freezer truck from a guy we don’t know. Why? Because it’s hot out and ice cream reminds us of our childhoods. It gives us momentary relief from the stresses of modern life. Eli Roth has decided to take this slice of American life and turn it on it’s head because of course he did.
His version of the ice cream man is a creepy, smiling dude who gives out weirdly named ice cream bars and cones. The kids flock to his truck after a baseball game and eat his ice cream treats like they are the best thing ever. Well, with the exception of the main character Jared who is lactose intolerant. The following morning, the kids wake up in a trance when the ice cream truck drives by their homes playing it’s happy music. The kids kill their unsuspecting parents and go to school and proceed to kill their teachers. Well, except for Jared who never ate the ice cream.
Jared finds a couple other kids who also didn’t eat the ice cream and they try to survive. It isn’t until they end up in the basement of the local church that they find a freezer full of this ice cream and the priest tells them of that time a few decades previously when a priest was caught molesting kids and the town blamed the ice cream man instead. Now, the ice cream man had made a deal with Satan to get revenge on the town. And it was Jared’s grandfather who forced all the kids back in the day to lie and say the ice cream man was at fault and it was Jared’s parents who helped lie when they were kids. Sure, Eli. **audible sigh**
I wasn’t really expecting much from Eli Roth’s Ice Cream Man, but in the era of what has become known as elevated horror he could have at least tried a little harder. This film feels like Weapons meets the gore of Terrifier but all of what made Weapons so great is missing. This Ice Cream Man is no Art the Clown. He is creepy, but the twist of the priest giving this backstory at the beginning of the final act feels like a disservice to the film. Moreover, why on earth would the church have this freezer to begin with if the priest wasn’t helping the ice cream man that whole time? And why weren’t the kids asking themselves this question? The priest tries to explain it by saying that kids trust people in uniform, but what? And why, if these parents were really molested by the ice cream man when they were kids, why would they let their own kids near an ice cream truck?
I get it. Eli Roth is going for camp. Unfortunately, he’s got two serious things interfering with this campiness. One – the church cover up to protect a priest is something that is all to real in our modern society. There could have been some real commentary here about how it still happens, but there isn’t. Two – one of the kids who didn’t go into the trance intentionally puked up her ice cream and says that she is a girl and girls apparently do that all the time and that its normal. Eating disorders aren’t normal or funny. Had she just been sick on the day in question, I’d be okay with this. Alas, an eleven year old girl with bulimia is supposed to be funny.
Eli Roth’s past films have some sort of intelligent awareness to them that make them great. Cabin Fever shows the slow descent into madness that mimics the illness infecting the cast. Hostel II shows a female protagonist who smartly out maneuvers the people trying to kill her and features an artfully done death where a woman baths in the blood of her victim. The House With a Clock In Its Walls so adeptly handles grief and loneliness that it manages to be really heart felt. Where was this smart storytelling, Eli?
If this film had handled the church coverup with some commentary about our modern society and combined that with the brutal, sometimes funny kills in this film, it could have been great. Especially with the twist at the end where the kids think they are killing the ice cream man’s corpse in a grave but are really killing their own masked parents. I mean, really make that revenge plot about reaping what you sow and how that hate is handed down from generation to generation. Maybe I took this too seriously because it felt so much like Weapons without being like Weapons, but I wanted intelligent yet gory Eli Roth. And he didn’t show up.
2.5 out of 5 stars. Great gore and kills. Lacking in any story or character depth.
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